Monday through Friday
Crawl out of bed thirty minutes late and curse and swear at myself for sleeping through the alarm before I get up to hit the snooze button and then fall back asleep for nine more minutes and repeat process.
Run out of the door fifteen minutes late with one shoe in my hand and my fly unzipped.
Arrive ten minutes late at day job and pray that the bosses are running late as well.
8:45 a.m. - 10:00 a.m.
Check work email, then personal email, and read snarky agent blogs causing me to question the quality of my work and if I should just face the facts...I'll be a nine to fiver until the day I die.
10:00 a.m. - 1:00 p.m.
Take care of the important day job tasks while I daydream about ways to improve my book.
1:00 p.m. - 2:00 p.m.
Eat a dry sandwich from Subway, run to the bank, go to the grocery store, the pet store, etc. and then try to speed read ten pages of a novel while I smoke a cigarette.
2:00 p.m. - 2:05 p.m.
Check personal email again to see if I have any manuscript requests and then sigh heavily with dissapointment when I discover I have none.
2:05 p.m. - 5:00 p.m.
Finalize all of my day job tasks while planning out my book tour having forgotten all of the advice from the snarky agent blogs.
5:00 p.m. - 5:30 p.m.
Kiss the husband, pat the dog, drink a beer and smoke a cigarette before settling into the home office.
5:30 p.m. - 6:00 p.m.
Eat a nutricious dinner of Triscuits and cheese log while reviewing submission requirements for several agents.
6:00 p.m. - 8:00 p.m.
Prepare new query letters, plot synopsis, biography, resume and whatever else agents are looking for. Possibly complete one or two agent submissions, and then drink another beer because regardless of what I have prepared and sent, I get the feeling that they will end in the same result...nothing.
8:00 p.m. - 12:00 p.m.
Work on new novel because I have convinced myself without a doubt that the first one is going nowhere. Yell at my husband in the room next door because his cursing at CSS is disrupting my train of thought. Since my concentration is broken, I get up and drink another beer and then swear at the cats for having thrown up on the kitchen table again. Clean up vomit, check facebook and then return to writing. (Repeat several times)
Go to sleep slightly drunk and try to end the day on a positive note by telling myself, "it only takes one"